Walking with Dinosaurs 3-D Review

Warning: Parents don't let your parents read this, because there's going to be strong language in here.

            So this movie called Walking with Dinosaurs 3-D at first glance from looking at a poster seems it could be a documentary that would teach kids about dinosaurs. However, that's not really what this movie is. I mean sure, there are several times when the movie pauses and gives a dinosaur name, its English translation, and whether that creature is a carnivore or a herbivore, but really it's a fiction movie about a dinosaur named Patchi (voiced by Justin Long) who is in a migration with several others of his species, and faces many obstacles with his older brother (voiced by Skyler Stone) and his love interest (voiced by Tiya Sircar) until he eventually becomes a hero of the land, or something along those lines. Oh, and a bird voiced by John Leguizamo goes along on the journey to provide narration
            One thing I do like about this movie is the computer-generated animation of the dinosaurs. They all look very nice and well-detailed, and they blend in very well with the photorealistic backgrounds. Unfortunately, this is where the positives end, because everything else in this movie COMPLETELY FUCKING SUCKED!!!
            First off, the beginning and ending scenes involving humans traveling to dig up dinosaurs are completely pointless. They don't really add anything to this so-called movie. Secondly, the voice acting is so goddamn atrocious. Seriously, these are honestly the most annoying voices I've ever heard in the field of animation. Instead of making me endeared by these characters like this movie wanted me to, I wanted to punch them in the fucking face just so they shut the hell up. It was that bad. They all felt so out of place. Thirdly, the writing is abysmal as well, as not only do the attempts at humor fall completely flat, but it's also feels the entire script was quickly written over an entire night never refining a single thing. I heard one reviewer say that the dialogue was Disney-fied, but truthfully, I think that is an insult to Disney movies, as most of the animated ones have much better writing than this.
           Okay in this paragraph, I really do need to go on an tangent on a certain element in the story. So, if you were planning to go and see this movie and don't see spoilers, skip this paragraph, although I'm pretty sure you weren't planning on seeing it anyway, so you might as well keep reading it. There's a certain scene where Patchi's dad dies trying to protect him and his older brother, and the movie tries to paint it as this sad event that's meant to theoretically tear you up. Here's the problem. Who actually gives a shit about his death? Seriously, who cares? This character is vapor, he is nothing. If you are a fiction movie, and you want to make the audience feel sad about a character's death that occurs during the movie, you need to make the audience care about that character first in order to give it the emotional impact it needs, otherwise, no one is going to give a flying fuck about it.
           There's this argument people have to negative reviews of kids movie saying, 'Oh it's just a kids movie, you are being too harsh on it.' Well, I'm sorry, but that is a bullshit excuse. Just because the target audience enjoys something aimed at them, doesn't mean that product is automatically a special snowflake free from any sort of criticism. Also, put into perspective that this was released in theaters. Kids can't go to the theaters by themselves, and need parents to go with them. The parents shouldn't have to suffer through a terrible experience, so there's no reason these movies shouldn't try to entertain both kids and their parents at the same time.
           This movie was originally not going to have voice acting or narration in it. That's probably what this movie should've been, although some narration explaining what's going on wouldn't hurt, but dumbs studio executives thought it was a good idea to put in character voice acting anyway, and the result stinks. At some point, I was so irritated with the movie, that there were moments where I just couldn't help but point my middle finger at my computer screen. Fuck this movie! It needs to burn in hell!
           I give "Walking with Dinosaurs 3-D"(2013) directed by Barry Cook and Neil Nightingale a 1 out of 10.

My Neighbor Totoro (1988) Review

          [Note: I'm reviewing the 2006 English dub here.]
          "My Neighbor Totoro" (1988) is fantasy animated film from Japan that is directed by Hayao Miyazaki. It tells the story of a professor and her two young girls who moved to an old house in the countryside to live closer to their mom who's in the hospital. Once they move there though, the two young girls slowly start interacting with mysterious yet friendly wood spirits.
          The art and animation looks great, and it amazingly hasn't aged a bit. It is full of beautiful colors and designs. I also admire its creativity as one of the fantasy creatures in here is a cat that serves as a bus. It's really cool. Parts of "My Neighbor Totoro" felt like a wonderfully, visionary dream.
          Another thing I truly appreciate about this movie is that it feels like a one-of-a-kind experience that I haven't seen before. It doesn't follow the standard cliches that a lot of kids movies have. Let me give you one example. Normally in kids movies, when children tell their parents about fantasy creatures they believe they saw, the adults just simply try to brush it off and try to convince their children that it isn't real and that they're fibbing or something. Not here though. The father has an accepting attitude towards their daughters in this movie. It was truly a breath of fresh air for me as I'm starting to get a little bit tired and irritated with that cliche in entertainment.
         When I first started watching "My Neighbor Totoro", it did feel a little overly-cutesy at moments when the two girls are playing around, but after a little bit, I didn't mind it too much. The English voice acting was also very good here. If you are into animation, definitely check this movie out. I honestly doubt you're going to see much else like it. I'm truly a big fan of Studio Ghibli's work.
         I give "My Neighbor Totoro" (1988) directed by Hayao Miyazaki a 9 out of 10.

Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) Review

         Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) is the sequel of the first Terminator movie from 1984. If you haven't seen the first one, you might be a little confused with some of the story elements in here, so just a head's up. In this movie, a robot called the T-800 or the Terminator (played by Arnold Schwarzenegger) has been sent to protect Sarah's Connor son John (played by Edward Furlong) as an evil T-1000 (made out of liquid metal) is out to destroy John. Meanwhile Sarah Connor from the first movie (played by Linda Hamilton) is imprisoned in a mental hospital after attempting to bomb a computer factory.
          When this was released in 1991, it was groundbreaking during its time as it featured computer-generated visual effects that included the first use of natural human motion. It looks great, and it still holds up today very nicely. Even when I have a little bit of trouble comprehending some of the story as it's been over a year since I've seen the first one, and there are parts of that movie that I don't exactly remember very well, it's still pretty intriguing. One thing I really appreciated in this movie was how the kid attempted to humanize the Arnold Schwarzenegger character. It was both funny and very sweet.
           And of course, the action sequences are extremely kick-ass and well done. It's a real blast seeing Schwarzenegger shooting the hell out of these baddies and it's fun to see all of those chases. Plus, as usual, with a Schwarzenegger movie, he delivers a few humorous lines. "Hasta la vista, baby!" "I need a vacation." "Shut up, dickwad." The only real complaint I had with this movie is that I thought it dragged on too long. Even though it was consistently entertaining, I got pretty tired and worn out when it ended.
           As far sequels go, this is definitely one of the better ones out there. I think it improves upon the original in a few ways. What a very good action movie this is. It is a true staple in helping the action movie genre become what it is today. For that reason and many others
, I give a lot of respect.
           I give "Terminator 2: Judgment Day" (1991) directed by James Cameron a 9 out of 10.

FernGully: The Last Rainforest (1992) Review

          FernGully: The Last Rainforest (1992) is an animated movie that tells the story of a fairy forest being in danger when a few loggers cut down many of the trees. In the midst, a fairy named Crysta (voiced by Samantha Mathis) accidentally shrinks one of the loggers named Zak (voiced by Jonathan Ward) down to her small size. Together they must try to help rally the fairies and animals to protect the rainforest before it's too late. Oh, and this also features Robin Williams as a confused bat. So that's pretty cool.
          If you've seen movies like Pocahontas or Avatar, you should have a pretty good idea on what to expect as far as storytelling goes as it is very similar. Its very pro-environment in its story and messages, whilst thankfully not being too preachy about them, and I personally agree with those messages. This is a very good movie to help teach kids about the environment while still being consistently entertaining. I think it's important for generations of people to learn about preserving nature and not mess with it.
          The animation and the backgrounds are all very beautiful to look at, the songs are all pretty much pleasant, and its heart is in the right place. I did however initially had trouble getting into a lot of the characters at first. Some of them did grow on me as the film progresses, while others didn't really do much for me either because they weren't very interesting or the movie doesn't give them enough screen time for me to truly care. That was the movie's weakest element. Plus, some of the songs didn't quite work for me.
          Besides that though, "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" is a very enjoyable animated movie. I liked it more than I expected. I'm pretty glad I bought the blu-ray of this movie for only $5. I wouldn't say it's amazing, but it's pretty good for what it aims to be.
          I give "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" (1992) directed by Bill Kroyer a 7 out of 10.

The Sandlot (1993) Review

           The Sandlot (1993) is a coming of age baseball movie. Scotty Smalls (played by Tom Guiry) recently moved into a new neighborhood, and is desperate on making new friends. He has an interest in joining the local sandlot baseball team, except he sadly sucks at it. But after a few attempts, he gets the hang of it soon enough. Then one day, after becoming good friends with the team, Smalls decides to steal his stepdad's baseball signed by Babe Ruth after their other ball goes missing. Well, it turns out that ball manages to go over the fence to a backyard home of a really mean dog. So the rest of the movie in the latter half involves the team trying to get the ball back, before Smalls gets into really big trouble.
           This is a really awesome feel-good movie. I'm not going to lie when I say that I kind of wish I was more into baseball than I currently am after watching this. The kids in this movie were all really well done actors, and the baseball games as well as other activities they do in the movie are all really fun to watch. I felt like a kid again, except that I didn't try to chew on tobacco before going on an amusement park ride, or drown in a pool in order to kiss a female lifeguard and be called a pervert. Hahaha. Yes those things happen in here, and they were pretty darn amusing.
           But perhaps the biggest laugh I had in this movie was when the team was competing against another young boy's baseball team and one of the insults as they go back and forth with each other is, "You swing like a girl!" Holy cow did I laugh really hard at that one. That's truly messed up. Hahaha. And I haven't even brought up the brilliant musical score and cinematography, both of which really helped add to the experience.
           "The Sandlot" is a perfect baseball movie for the entire family to enjoy, and also a perfect movie to watch if you're looking for something that will brighten your mood. I personally had a total blast with this one, and I'm really excited to recommend this one to any of you readers if you haven't seen it already. Definitely check this one out.
            I give "The Sandlot" (1993) directed by David Mickey Evans a 10 out of 10.

Gremlins (1984) Review

          Gremlins (1984) is a horror comedy which tells the story of an inventor (played by Hoyt Axton) who looks through an antique shop in search for Christmas gifts and discovers a small cute little furry creature called a 'Mogwai'. He takes it back to his family and nicknames it 'Gizmo'. There are three rules that the family needs to follow in order to properly take care of this thing which are as follows: 1) Never expose it to bright light (especially sunlight, which will kill it), 2) Never let it touch water because that'll cause it to multiply), and most importantly 3) Whatever you do, don't feed it after midnight because it'll into a gremlin which will ultimately cause chaos. Well shockingly enough, all three 3 rules are broken and all hell breaks loose, so it's up to William Peltzer (played by Zach Galligan) to try to kill all of the gremlins in the town to save the day.
          The special effects in regards to the creatures are all great, and still hold up today. The way the Mogwais move their eyes and eyelids looks brilliant and they're really adorable. The gremlins are also really fun monsters. The film gladly doesn't itself too seriously with them as they are seen smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol, taking control of vehicles, messing with lights, eating and throwing around food everywhere, and more. There was one really cute scene where are all the gremlins sing "Heigh-Ho" from "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves". It was awesome.
         The acting from the humans is all pretty good for this type of movie, and I really liked the fact that the movie is set during the Christmas holiday, which makes for a interesting black comedy. My only real issues with the movie are that the pacing could've been tightened up just a little bit as there were parts that felt a little slow-going, and this may sound a little nitpicky but, perhaps I would've liked just a little bit more drama for the human characters since there were moments where I actually felt sympathy for them.
         But on the whole, "Gremlins" is a very good movie that pretty much knows exactly what it aims to be, and thankfully doesn't really push to be much more than that. I may end up watching this annually over the holidays as I had a very fun time. I'm very happy I tried it out.
         I give "Gremlins" (1984) directed by Joe Dante an 8 out of 10.

Hercules in New York (1970) Review

           Hercules in New York (1970) is the film debut for Arnold Schwarzenegger (credited as Arnold Strong in this movie) back when his English was a lot shittier. Essentially, Arnold plays the title role of Hercules here. The story revolves around Hercules being bored as hell in his hometown in Greece, so without Zeus' permission, he somehow travels by plane and boat to New York. In New York, he befriends a couple of people and goes on a few fun adventures.
           This is definitely the type of movie that would easily be made fun of by the show "Mystery Science Theater 3000". If you don't know, "Mystery Science Theater 3000" is a show where a human and two robots make fun of really shitty movies. So what I'm implying here is that "Hercules in New York" was poorly made. The acting is weak sauce, the music is basically a bunch of cheesy piccolo playing, scenes are poorly constructed and don't feel like they flow together very well, certain plot inconsistencies, and there are a couple of character interactions that don't feel resolved at all. Plus, to make matters worse than they are, there was a scene where Arnold is fighting a loose bear and it was so poorly lit that I couldn't see shit.
           If you enjoy Arnold Schwarzenegger as much as I do, you may have fun with this one. Despite his horrible English here, he has a lot of irresistible charm. Not only does he get to show off his abs a lot, he gets to say a few fun cheesy lines with amusing delivery. My favorite scene in this movie was when he was walking around with his female friend and he stumbles upon a poster of a movie or a play that's related to Hercules and he says, "That is not Hercules. He doesn't even look like me. What is the name of the imitator? Who gave him permission to pretend to be Hercules?" Hahahaha. There are a few moments like that which may potentially make the movie so bad it's good for some people.
           Overall, to its credit, while watching "Hercules in New York", I never came across a point where I felt I was torturing myself due to how bad it is. So if you're in the mood to watch a movie when you're bored, you could do much worse. You might even have a few laughs with this one at a party or something. Just don't expect much of anything that's actually good here. Hahaha.
           I give "Hercules in New York" directed by Arthur Allan Seidelman a 4 out of 10.

The Shining (1980) Review

           The Shining (1980) is a psychological horror movie where a guy named Jack Torrance (played by Jack Nicholson) interviews for the position of winter caretaker of the Overlook Hotel and gets the job. He then brings in his wife (played by Shelley Duvall) and son (played by Danny Lloyd) to stay in the hotel during the winter months. Unfortunately, things don't all go well as slowly but surely, some crazy, weird psychological shit happens.
           After just viewing this for the very first time, I think "The Shining" might be one of my personal favorite movies. I'm serious. The way that the movie slowly builds tension as it goes along, while the creepy-ass score plays amidst all of this, made it all genuinely scary. Jack Nicholson does a great job of portraying a man who seems normal at first but then turns into a fucked up individual. Danny Lloyd also creeped me the hell out at times, especially during scenes where he seems to take in a different soul.
           This is the type of movie where at a few points while watching it you may be going, 'Wait. What on earth is going on?' I may have to spend a devoted amount of time after writing this just trying to comprehend what was going on in certain portions of it. But thankfully, it never bothered that I couldn't comprehend things while watching it because, it's so consistently entertaining from beginning to end that I never feel cheated on as an audience member unlike something like "Muholland Dr.". Everything just seemed to click for me from the acting, direction, cinematography, storytelling, and atmosphere.
           I'm officially starting to become a horror movie fan with "Psycho" and now this. I look forward to trying out more of these. This was a masterfully crafted creepy and memorable experience for me. I know I heard this movie isn't faithful to the book its based on (which I never read), but really, that doesn't matter since "The Shining" holds up perfectly well on its own as a movie. Definitely check this one out if you're a horror fan.
           I give "The Shining" (1980) directed by Stanley Kubrick a 10 out of 10.

Robots (2005) Review

          "Robots" (2005) is an animated feature from the same studio that made all the Ice Age movies (Blue Sky Studios). It tells the story of how Rodney Copperbottom (voiced by Ewan McGregor) dreams of being an inventor after he's been introduced to seeing this very influential robot named Bigweld (voiced by Mel Brooks) on TV. So Rodney invented this cute little gadget named "Wonderbot" although this invention of his doesn't seem to work that greatly in his hometown. So then Rodney decides to go to Robot City to meet his idol and show him his invention. But oh no, Bigweld's not around as somebody else is currently in charge of Bigweld Industries named Ratchet (voiced by Greg Kinnear) who's a greedy douchebag that just wants to make a profit. He discontinues the manufacturing of spare robots parts which could lead to a bunch of robots being turned into scrap, so Rodney and a group of quirky characters decide to stop Ratchet's dirty deeds once and for all.
           "Robots" has a lot of good moments in it. There's a very creative and visually good-looking robotic world that's realized here. I loved the idea that robots are born by being constructed. That was pretty cute. There were also a decent amount of times in which I laughed, some of which are provided by the character of Fender (voiced by Robin Williams). Hey, Robin Williams is a welcome addition for any movie he's in on my book with his comic energy. I also enjoyed Jim Broadbent as the voice of Madame Gasket. Another thing I liked was that there were a few fun, exciting sequences here. Two scenes are devoted into navigating the city which feel likes the most intense amusement park ride ever, and one really cool scene involving dominoes.
            Sadly while "Robots" is indeed pretty good and admittedly better than a lot of other crap that's out there, it's usually never great. Despite being in a world we've never seen before, it feels very by-the-numbers. You have your protagonist who's a determined leader that stands up to form's a plan to kick the villain's butt. You have your comedic sidekick that the audience is supposed to laugh at, and don't get me wrong, Robin Williams is funny here in this movie, but he somehow kind of feels like a less memorable version of the Genie from "Aladdin". Genie had the advantage of transforming into different variety of figures, while the humor for Fender is having his body parts fall off a lot of the time. And of course, you have a bunch of added stuff in here to help make it a feel-good experience from the pop-culture references, the inspirational speeches, attempts to bring in love interests for certain characters (which feels kind of forced here), to even having certain smaller characters you've seen in the beginning happily reappear towards the end. There wasn't really much here that feels fresh.
           Some of the voice cast, while not outright bad, do feel miscast. Ewan McGregor (a British actor) sounds kind of awkward trying to do an American accent, which begs the question, why not just bring an American actor to do the role if an American voice is what the filmmakers were going for? Now I like Mel Brooks, but I honestly don't think he's the right choice for voicing Bigwell. His character just never came across as an inspirational grandfather figure. And unfortunately, a lot of the other characters here like Piper, Lug, and even Aunt Fanny just don't feel like they added much to the story at all.
          I know I'm getting a little too in-detail here. I'm just a guy who like going into what works for me and what doesn't. Despite my nitpicks, I will say that at the bare minimum, "Robots" does work and is pretty fun. Just don't have high expectations going into this, and you'll do fine. I'm very happy I revisited this movie by purchasing the Blu-Ray for only $5. I would've liked something more to it, but overall, I did moderately enjoy it.
          I give "Robots" (2005) directed by Chris Wedge a 6 out of 10.

Hook (1991) Review

          Hook (1991) is a family action-adventure movie where Peter Pan as an adult (played by Robin Williams) struggles to get along with his kids, as he is so concentrated on his work. He pretty much lost a sense of fun too. Unfortunately for him, his children get kidnapped by Hook from Neverland. So Peter has to go back to Neverland to save them. However, in order to do that, he needs to reclaim his youthful spirit so he can challenge Hook.
          Alright, confession time: I watched the Disney animated version of Peter Pan a bunch of times when I was a kid. I still remember having fun watching the scenes where Hook gets attacked by the crocodile. Haha. Now, I have heard about this adaptation of Peter Pan a few years ago, and this going to sound really shallow but, I was scared of trying it for the simple reason of negative critical reviews this movie got. Yeah, it can be really hard sometimes to judge whether something is worth seeing since films are very subjective. However, I regret avoiding this for so long because I enjoyed "Hook" a lot.
          First off, I really enjoyed the casting. Dustin Hoffman is very menacing as Hook, Bob Hoskins does a great job of portraying a jolly yet somewhat bumbling fool as Smee, Julia Roberts is really cute as Tinkerbell, Maggie Smith is very charming as Wendy, and of course, Robin Williams is awesome in a role who lost all of his childhood sensibilities and happily regains them. Thanks to the acting, I actually found myself caring more about the characters than I initially expected. Also, the sets in Neverland all look beautiful and are filled with glorious detail.
          "Hook" does a very nice job in mixing drama with fun adventure and action, but beyond that, it also felt very magical to the point where I believed and wished this fictional place existed. I'm serious. I truly did feel like a young kid again. Out of all the Peter Pan movies I've seen, this might be favorite. I can't say absolutely for sure, but I might like this more than the Disney cartoon.
           I have a couple of complaints which really don't affect the movie that much. Some of the green screen effects (where Peter Pan is flying) have aged terribly, and while I was thankfully never really bored during its 142 minute running time, there were still a few moments where it felt like it dragged on a tad bit too long. Besides that though, I really had no problems.
           "Hook" is a really good movie that had me more emotionally involved as it went along. I'm very happy I saw it. I don't exactly understand the hate it got. I believe this is so much better than some people make it out to be. Definitely check this one out for sure if you haven't already.
            I give "Hook" (1991) directed by Steven Spielberg a 9 out of 10.

Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987) Review

           Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987) is just simply one of those movies that I'm freaking amazed it actually exists. Especially since the first movie in 1984 was pulled out of theaters due to all of the controversy surrounding it. Actually, I haven't even seen the first one because I heard half of this sequel consisted of footage from the first movie in the form of flashbacks. So I just went right into this sequel here.
           In this movie, Ricky (played by Eric Freeman) is talking to a psychiatrist after he went on a insane murdering spree. He first tells him all of the past events involving his older brother Billy (which I will repeat that it consists of footage from the first movie). By the way, I honestly had trouble stomaching the footage from the first movie because of how sadistic it is. And really, they probably should've cut at least some of that footage out, because parts of the footage involves scenes that Ricky was either too young to remember, or scenes he never even witnessed. What the fuck?
           Later, the movie picks up a little when we get to see new footage involving Ricky's life as he grew older like his relationship, and how he became a killer, leading up to the point where he ended up getting caught. Some of the deaths were pretty funny (like this one time where Ricky impales a guy using an umbrella). Most of the acting just pretty much sucked ass but I did enjoy James Newman playing the psychiatrist.
           Also Eric Freeman who plays Ricky, was just really damn funny with his over-the-top acting. He's pretty insane with his excessive use of moving his eyebrows when he speaks. In fact, Eric Freeman is what saved this movie from being a total drag for me. It almost helped made this movie so bad it's worth watching except I was still bored throughout a lot of this movie.

           Yeah, this is really just nothing but a pile of shit. Trust me, if you just watched this entertaining overview of the first two movies (which I will insert the video to), you are not going to miss a goddamn thing as it shows ALL of my favorite moments from the sequel. Watching "Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2" was kind of a waste of time for me. Don't bother.
           I give "Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2" (1987) directed by Lee Harry a 3
out of 10.

Nutcracker: The Motion Picture (1986) Review

           Nutcracker: The Motion Picture (1986) is based on the Pacific Northwest Ballet production of the infamous Nutcracker play with illustrations designed by Maurice Sendak (whose well known for children's books like Where the Wild Things Are). In case you aren't familiar with the play, let me try to inform on it with the best of my ability. The whole play is basically the story of a young girl dreaming of a nutcracker prince and a fierce battle against the mouse king (who has seven heads in some adaptations, although in this movie, there's only three).
           However, when going into this movie (as well as the play), expect a lot of ballet dancing. That's actually pretty much what the entire movie revolves around. If watching ballet dancing doesn't suit well with you, stay far away from this movie. Actually, that's the main reason why I didn't like "Nutcracker: The Motion Picture" very much. It had really beautiful sets and costumes, and I loved listening to the musical score by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky, but watching all of those ballet sequences were driving me crazy.
           Even if you don't mind watching a lot of ballet scenes (which admittedly the dancers do a good job here), the filming is kind of a mess. There were a lot of awkward close-ups of the dancers. I know Carroll Ballard was trying to make this feel more like a movie than a play, but seeing the performers full bodies the entire would've looked a lot better here. Also, remember that fierce battle against the mouse king. Yeah, I dare you to try to comprehend what on earth was going on in that scene. Seriously, this is perhaps the most poorly filmed action sequence I've seen in a long while.
           Alright, I give the movie some credit. The opening scenes with an illustrator sketching the sets and characters, along the dream-dancers on the bedsheets with the big sleeping girl in the background were well done. And while I overall wasn't thrilled by the dancing, I have to say I really like this one scene where somebody dresses in full costume as a fat Chinese tiger surrounded by four children. The way that tiger danced around had a personality and presence that I really enjoyed. I wish more of the sequences were like that.
           If you want to watch a film adaptation of the Nutcracker play, this isn't completely horrible, but it'll do little for everyone else who's not interested. And really, while I enjoyed the score very much, I can just easily listen to it on my laptop if I really wanted to, so there's no point in me revisiting this ever again. A few good moments just didn't stop me from finding this movie really dull.
           I give "Nutcracker: The Motion Picture" (1986) directed by Carroll Ballard a 4 out of 10.

Red (2010) Review

         "Red" (2010) which stands for "Retired and Extremely Dangerous" stars Bruce Willis as a retired CIA agent somehow having phone conversations with Mary-Louise Parker, even though they never met before. So I'm going to assume Bruce discovered her at an online dating site or something.
Well, it turns out that his phone has been tapped and people are trying to kill them. So Bruce goes all the way into Kansas City to try to protect Mary-Louise, all while later teaming up with Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich, Helen Mirren, and Brian Cox.
          Now that sounds pretty badass, doesn't it? Also, back when I watched it back when it came out in theaters, I recall it had amusing moments in it. So I was really looking forward to revisiting it. Sadly, I was oddly underwhelmed with "Red". Even for an action movie that doesn't take itself too seriously, it needs to consistently entertain me the entire way through from the action scenes, the humor, and the downtime between the characters.
          The movie has some funny stuff in here with lines like "Are you going to take your knife out of my balls?", and some of the action was really cool, but it never takes off. Let's talk about the romance between Bruce Willis and Mary-Louise Parker. It falls flat on its face. I seriously didn't feel any chemistry at all between the two, and if a romance in a movie isn't going to bring any sort of chemistry, what's even the point?
          I think part of this movie's problem too is that it feels like it really needed more action sequences and a whole lot more laughs to truly make the experience worthwhile. This also could've helped me overlook the really bland and boring story involving an illegal arms dealer and a vice president.
          Overall, I didn't exactly feel like I wasted my time, as this did help cheer me up from a bad mood as I like said before, there were fun moments in here. But compared to other action movies out there (including ones that don't take themselves very seriously), "Red" doesn't hold up that well. It might be a nice rental, but this is not a must-see by any stretch. It could've been so much better.
          I give "Red"(2010) directed by Robert Schwentke a 5 out of 10.

Inside Out (2015) Review

         "Inside Out" (2015), Pixar's newest movie delves into the question of 'What exactly goes on in our heads?' Well, according to this movie, it consists of five emotions controlling our thoughts which are joy, sadness, fear, disgust, and anger. In this movie, they are what make a person a person. I really don't want to spoil much of the story here because, this is one of those movies where I want you, the reader, to see it for yourself if you haven't seen the trailer.
          This is one of those rare movies where it had such a profound impact on me after I've watched it, that it made me so grateful to be alive. That's not an exaggeration at all. This is absolutely my favorite movie to come out on 2015 that I've seen so far this year, and Pixar's best since Toy Story 3. It made me laugh really hard a lot, while also making me very emotional to the point where I even honestly cried a couple of times. It never feels melodramatic, thus every heart-tugging moment in here truly felt earned.
          It's really great to see a kid's movie that treats its audience with respect. None of it contains any sort of worthless poop or fart jokes that would theoretically help appeal to young kids. I'm not saying those jokes in kids movies are necessarily outright bad, but they're over saturated to the point where I kind of find it inappropriate and pretty unfunny. This movie deals with very mature themes involving memories, and goes into very interesting creativity on what's go on in a person's mind when they're young.
          And of course, as expected in Pixar movies, the animation in this movie is brilliant. I know I sound like I'm obsessing my enjoyment of this movie, but I seriously can't help myself. I feel really happy that I saw it, and I want to openly share my love with it to all of you. This perfectly represents why I go to movies. I can't recommend this one enough.
          I give "Inside Out" directed by Pete Doctor an enthusiastic 10 out of 10!

The Wind Rises (2013) Review

           The Wind Rises (2013) is the last animated movie directed by Hayao Miyazaki before he retired. This is a fictionalized biopic of Jiro Horikoshi where we see him dreaming about making airplanes as a young kid, then it jumps to him as an adult in a university realizing his dream designing airplanes during World War II. There's also a romance taking place during the second half of the movie.
           The thing that really blew my mind away while watching this was the animation. It was all so beautifully hand drawn. Everything in the art has a great attention to detail from the colors to the shapes. It's extremely dreamlike to the eye. "The Wind Rises" looks really damn good.
           Compared to Miyazaki's other work, this is more realistic. What this movie does so well in addition to the art, was how it captures someone as a child who grows older having a dream, maintaining a dream, and always envisioning it when going about daily life. I can relate to this because, for a long time, and still to this day, I'm envisioning a lot of creative ideas for potential future movies. And when we see this character actually living his dream designing airplanes and seeing how things could be included in these airplane designs, I felt very rewarded during the experience.

            Like I said, there's a romance later in the movie that I thought was all so beautifully handled and very sweet. Even though this was all animated, I felt like I was watching that I could potentially meet in real life. I'm serious. They felt very real, and they grew on me very dearly. This is the type of movie that would be enjoyed by kids and adults, but the sort of thing that I think adults would appreciate a whole lot more. The very type where if you enjoyed watching it as a kid, and you discover the themes that are in this movie if you decided to continue watching it as you grow older.                                                                                        

"The Wind Rises" is a truly great sendoff to a great animated director, and after seeing this, I really want to get around to watching all of his previous work. It was a truly magical experience for me. I can't recommend it enough if you love animation.
           I give "The Wind Rises" directed by Hayao Miyazaki a 10 out of 10.

The Spectacular Now (2013) Review

          The Spectacular Now (2013) stars Miles Teller as a high school senior who's kind of the life of the party and Shailene Woodley as another high school senior who's pretty much the opposite of him (the quiet, nerdy type if you will). Miles was just getting over a relationship with another girl, then Shailene and him meet after Miles somehow passed out in her front lawn. Soon after, they form a relationship between each other, which results in the movie showing us a realistic portrayal of young love and also how youth deals with family problems and such.
          Okay guys, bear with me here. Writing this review is going to be pretty hard for me. Why? Well, this is the type of movie that I think is really good for what it is, but at the same time, this isn't exactly for me. See, I'm not always big into movies that are sad or have sad moments in them. I'm not trying to say movies shouldn't ever have conflict in them. I mean I cried during movies like "E.T." and "The Iron Giant", but I definitely see myself revisiting them. Not so much here. There are times when I feel like I was invading somebody's personal privacy, and I was hearing dark things about somebody's life that I felt sorry and ashamed of hearing about.
          Let me be absolutely clear here. This does not in any way represent the quality of the movie, which as I said before is very good. Shailene Woodley right now might be one of my favorite actresses today. Even in movies that I didn't like too much, she always does a fantastic job in her acting, including this movie. Miles Teller also does a good job here. He seems confident a lot, while also trying to secretly hide his pain. Towards the end, you can really see his character maturing.
          Not once in this movie did I ever come across a scene that seemed fake. It always felt real, even I didn't go through a lot of the same experiences as these characters did in this movie. It's very sweet when it wants to be, and also very heartbreaking when it wants to be. I also appreciated how this movie isn't all about 'big moments' in life until later on in the movie. You're basically pretty much experiencing the everyday lives of teenagers here.
          If you want a realistic portrayal of young love, go try this at least once. Just keep in mind that isn't a completely feel-good movie here. And like I said, this isn't exactly for me, and I probably won't see it again in a long time, but I do give it a lot of respect on how well made it is and I'm very glad I saw it.
          I give "The Spectacular Now" (2013) directed by James Ponsoldt an 8 out of 10.

Jurassic World (2015) Review

           Jurassic World (2015) is the fourth movie in the series that just came out in theaters. None of the original characters in the first one reappear here except for the character of Dr. Henry Wu (played by B.D. Wong), who is the head of the team that created the dinosaurs for the park. In this movie, the island Isla Nublar (the setting of the first movie) has been expanded and transformed into an amusement park named 'Jurassic World'. Unfortunately, things don't go well as a creature named Indominus rex runs rampant across the park, and of course, the humans need to figure out a way to stop it before it kills hundreds of innocent tourists.

           How are the dinosaurs this time around? Because I'm sure that's what a lot of people are going to want to be seeing when they go see this movie. In the first two, it used both CGI and robotics for the dinosaurs which looked great. The third one used CGI and a small amount of robotics as well, but they looked like shit. They didn't seem convincing at all. For 'Jurassic World', it's all CGI this time around. No animatronics. And my God, they look freaking amazing here! It's the best, most convincing dinosaurs I've seen on screen yet. It usually feels like I wasn't seeing computer imagery, but real critters. It's that damn good. The action scenes were also very fun and brought in a great amount of tension.

           The main protagonist here is Owen Grady (played by Chris Pratt) who is a velociraptor expert and trainer. Chris Pratt did such a great job in his role. He brought in just the right amount of confidence and sternness to his character. I definitely look forward to seeing him in more future roles. By the way, one of my very favorite scenes in the entire movie was when he was spending a bit of time training the raptors. It was amazing! Bryce Dallas Howard also did a good job playing the park operations manager.

           'Jurassic World', I'm afraid isn't without its flaws. I really didn't care for the two kids in the movie. They were just kind of obnoxious, and for each scene they're in, the movie just went downhill for me. Also, sadly, this is one of the movies that made me feel exhausted after it's over because it dragged on way too long. Towards the end, while the action scenes were still freaking good, it got to a point where they wore me out after a while.

            If you want to see dinosaurs kick butt, you absolutely can't go wrong with this one. I'm very happy that this turned out as well as it did after seeing the crappy 'Jurassic Park III". It's not a great movie, but it sure is a pretty fun one.

            I give "Jurassic World" (2015) directed by Colin Trevorrow a 7 out of 10.

The Last Unicorn (1982) Review

           The Last Unicorn (1982) is an animated movie where a unicorn named Lady Amalthea (voiced by Mia Farrow) just learned that she's the last unicorn in existent. Thus, she sets off of a journey finding the other unicorns and trying to figure out where they've all gone off to, whilst meeting a few characters along the way including witches, magicians, princes and more.

           Now before I get into my thoughts on this movie, I want to discuss how I discovered this movie. I was looking in the Classics genre in the iTunes movie section, and I saw the poster for this movie called "The Last Unicorn", and I was like, 'what the heck is that?' I've honestly never heard of this movie before, so I saw a little clip of it which looked promising, and after doing a little research, I noticed that this was made by the same people responsible for the infamous 'Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer' stop-motion TV special, Rankin and Bass. So then I decided to buy a digital copy of it for myself and give it a try, just so I can see if I like it or not. How was it?

           Well, one thing I really enjoyed when watching this movie was looking at the animation and background art. It looked so beautiful being filled with bright colors. I really felt like I was in a fairy tale. The art is what kept me interested throughout the entire run time. There are songs here by the band 'America', and while I wouldn't say they're memorable, they get the job done well enough. The voice acting isn't half- bad either. I especially enjoyed Rene Auberjonois as this skull that guards a clock. He was amusing.

            I honestly wish the characters were just as brilliant as the art, but unfortunately, they aren't. They're pretty much flat and not very interesting, and this dragged the movie down a lot for me, as of course this film wants you to actually root for the heroes. And that's too bad. There were certain points where I found the writing interesting with the riddles and such, but then at other times, it just felt very stilted. The movie tries to bring some sort of relationship between the unicorn and a prince, but not once did I ever feel any sort of romance or chemistry between the two characters. And even at 92 minutes, there were a few times when the movie felt rather slow.

            This movie is rated 'G', but you have to understand that this was rated back in 1982 during a time when it was considered okay to use the words 'damn' and 'hell' in a G-rated movie. So this is a caution for any parents out there that are potentially curious about showing it to their kids. Personally, this didn't bother me, but I can see how some parents might be turned off by that.

            "The Last Unicorn" might be worth a look if you enjoy great visual art, and I might revisit it from time to time for that reason alone. For everyone else though, it's really hard for me to recommend it, as the problems I have with it drag this movie down to average.

             I give "The Last Unicorn" directed by Jules Bass and Arthur Rankin Jr. a 5 out of 10.

Jurassic Park III (2001) Review

            Jurassic Park III (2001) is the third entry in this popular series of movies of, well duh, Jurassic Park. Dr. Alan Grant from the first movie (played by Sam Neill) has been tricked by a divorced couple to go to an island to help find their missing son. And then, the entire rest of the movie basically revolves around running away from dinosaurs, finding a safe spot, and then repeat.
            If you read my reviews for the first two movies, you'll know that I really enjoyed them. They were really exciting and entertaining while also having really interesting characterizations. I even feel tempted to try out the books by Michael Crichton because of how much I was entertained by them. Jurassic Park III on the other hand, sadly kind of sucked.
            Are you the type of person who wants good characters and story in an action movie? Well I'm going to strongly suggest that you DON'T BOTHER with this one. Besides Sam Neill and a brief appearance by Laura Dern's character, the characters in this movie were either boring or annoying as hell. The divorced couple in particular was very badly written. It was really impossible for me to actually give so much of a shit about them because they got on my nerves. And the story itself is just a stupid-ass excuse for a bunch of random characters to set on an island and be in danger.
            Maybe this movie can be somewhat redeemed if the action sequences are good, right? Well, that depends. If you aren't picky on how skillfully made they are, you might have fun with them. But whenever green screen is used for the actors, it looks painfully obvious since the humans have a different color contrast than the background. Also, the computer-generated dinosaurs which looked pretty damn good in the first two movies, just looked really fake and badly animated a lot of the time. It also feels like this movie's missing sort of human villain or something. It could've added maybe at least something to the story.
            To its credit, Jurassic Park III isn't complete crap. Sam Neill is a really entertaining presence here. It was pretty cool to see him again. And some of the action in the second half honestly wasn't too bad. It was kind of okay. And there was this small scene I found pretty amusing, where Dr. Grant has a nightmare on the plane and he sees a raptor that says "Alan! Alan!" Hahaha. It was dumb, but it was funny. The length is also short enough to not make it a complete chore to sit through.
            All in all though, even with that small bit of praise I just mentioned, this movie is still just not very good. I suppose I can see some people enjoying Jurassic Park III in a guilty pleasure sort of way, but even then, there are some campy action movies out there that I still consider a whole lot better. It's not the worst thing in existence, but I am so glad that I'll never have to watch this film ever again.
            I give Jurassic Park III (2001) directed by Joe Johnston a 4 out of 10.

Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997) Review

             Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997) is the sequel to the original Jurassic Park four year earlier. This time, the dinosaurs have been free to roam around an island off the Pacific Coast. Unfortunately, John Hammond loses control of his company InGen to his nephew where he wants to bring the dinosaurs back to the mainland to restore the company and bring up its revenue, so John decides to send an expedition to reach the island before InGen's team does. One of the people he asks is Ian Malcolm from the first film (played by Jeff Goldblum). He initially refuses, but decides to get involved after hearing that his girlfriend (played by Julianne Moore) is part of the group, so he tries to get her to safety.
             Is this movie as good as the first movie? No, but I don't exactly get the hate for it either. It's actually a pretty decent sequel if you can believe that. Just like the first one, it uses robotics and computer generated imagery for the dinosaurs, and it still looks really damn impressive. There were a couple of moments where humans are carrying an injured baby dinosaur (who's a robotic), and even though it was fake, it looked so believable and real. I actually felt for the little guy.
             Also, just like the original movie, there's a lot of great tension where there were moments where I was on the edge of my seat. In particular, there's this amazing sequence where a T-rex brings a trailer off a cliff, and Jeff Goldblum, Julianne Moore, and Vince Vaughn have to hang on to dear life for safety. It was a really exciting scene! Another scene I loved was where Julianne Moore's character was sleeping in a tent, and we can see the shadow of a T-Rex, and she has to try to hide her sleeping bag so she can't be seen. There were plenty of thrilling moments that kept me entertained throughout.
             I'm really glad we get to know more about Jeff Goldblum's character since he was more of a side character in the original. This movie delves into his personal life to an extent involving his girlfriend and his daughter (played by the talented Vanessa Lee Chester), and we get to see more depth to him as a result, which I very much appreciated.
             As far as flaws go, I really found Pete Postlethwaite and Richard Schiff pretty boring in their roles. They felt kind of lifeless to be honest. Also, the way the movie sets up to the very last action sequence at the end felt very abrupt. I was like, 'Wait. What's going on again?' It felt awkward. Maybe if they added scenes near the last part of the movie, it would've more effective, at least for me.
             Do you feel like you can't get enough of Jurassic Park after just seeing the first one? Definitely watch this movie for sure. It was a lot of fun, and it's one of Spielberg's more underappreciated works.
             I give "Lost World: Jurassic Park" (1997) directed by Steven Spielberg an 8 out of 10.